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Letter: You betcha, dat roundabout whirligig confuses a guy

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 “Dear,” the Mrs. sez, “I’m low on my medication. Can we go out to Kmart and pick up a prescription?”

“Yep,” I sez.

Well, we live just off West Lake Drive so we loaded up and went south along the lake, then west on Munson Lake Road out to Highway 59, where we turnt north.

About a mile up the line I sez to the Mrs., “What the heck is that?”

She sez, “I think that’s the new whirligig that they built?”

“What?” I sez, “They put it right in the middle of the road. What the heck should a guy do?”

“Well,” she sez, “The yellow sign shows three arrows going in a circle so you’d better follow what it shows.”

Well, I get up to it and I see a lot of blacktop and sea-ment. So I went around in a circle like the sign sez for a couple of times and then I sez to the Mrs., “The blacktop ain’t getting us to Kmart.”

She sez, “Nope. Maybe you should try getting up on the sea-ment circle. There’s a lot of tire tracks on it.”

So I did and I made a couple of more rounds. I sez, “This isn’t getting us to Kmart either.”

The Mrs. sez, “Nope. I see your face is getting red. You’d better take a sip of coffee.” So I did and went around two more times.

So I said to the Mrs., “I’m just going to hold the wheel straight and see what the heck happens. That darn whirligig shot me off to the west toward Long Lake. We proceeded for about 40 rods and I told the Mrs. that this wasn’t the way to Kmart, so we turnt around and went back east, where we saw the yellow sign with three arrows in a circle.

I sez, “There’s that dang whirligig again. I suppose I’d better get up on that sea-ment again and see what happens.” I went around it a couple of times and said to her, “This ain’t getting us to Kmart.”

She sez, “Nope. I see your face is getting red again. You’d better take another shot of coffee.” So I did. I went around a couple of more times and then I told the Mrs. that I was going to hold the wheel straight again. The dang whirligig spit me out to the east on Willow. We got down about 40 rods and I sez, “This ain’t getting us to Kmart.”

She sez, “Nope, but that’s OK. We can stop at Bergens. I want to get a couple of plants.” So when she got back to the car I asked her “How bad do you need your subscription or do you have enough pills to get by?”

“Well,” she sez, “If we go out to the whirligig again we’d better go gas up. Maybe we should just go home,” which we did.

When we got home the Mrs. sez, “Next time when we go, we’d better go up Washington Avenue and west on Highway 10 like we used to.”

“Yah,” I sez, “We can wait until the kids come home from the cities before we use Highway 59 again. They probably know how those dang whirligigs work.”

And the Mrs. sez, “Yah.” 

(By the way, I think the roundabout is a great improvement). — Roy Smith, Detroit Lakes

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