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RJ Dupre Column: When forgiveness pays off

Forgiveness is one of the toughest actions to put forth in our daily lives. It requires humility, understanding willingness and acceptance. Most of us swear that we will never let go of our anger when someone does us wrong and we keep our distances from the source of our pain.

Such a situation occurred in my life many years ago, when someone was instrumental in the custody loss of my children. It caused a great deal of rage and undeserved victimization and many dark times. I thought I would go to my grave hating this person. The problem with such deep resentment was that it enslaved me and gave power to the perpetrator, who did not deserve such a hold on my life.

After a lot of prayers and soul searching, I came to the realization that forgiveness would set me free. It had nothing to do with being approved of by my so-called enemy. It was about quitting the war within.

Two years ago, a horrible situation occurred with one of my children and one morning, I picked up the phone, called this individual and, for the first time in 15 years, we fought side by side to save my child from a gut-wrenching situation. From our willingness to cooperate for the safety of another human being, we left behind our self-centered motives and shut the door on a past we refused to revisit.

When someone does you wrong, surrender them and yourself to the spirit and forgive. After all, life is too precious and too short to cosign such misery.